you're not going to like this one...

Kids... sometimes daddies have to be direct, and blunt, and even mean.  Like when someone hurts their little girls.  Here is an email I had to send today.  I may delete this before you ever read it, but I had to get it out for now...

Cole,

I'm really hoping this only needs to be addressed once. It seems silly to have to say this, but I'm going to have to say it anyway.
You don't tell a 5 year old that she's "annoying". You never call a 6 year old a "coward". There is never a reason you would take a 5 year old girl, and put her in your baby's crib because she's "acting like a baby". AND YOU SURE AS SHIT DON'T EVER DO ANY OF THOSE THINGS TO MY DAUGHTERS!
You've been "playing daddy" long enough. You've got your own child now, you're a daddy... grow the fuck up.
I really hope we're clear on that. If I've left you confused about any of this, I am more than happy to clarify.
Now, having vented, I should tell you that which you should already know. My daughters little hearts are the most important thing in all of this. Not your pride, not my anger. I'll let go of my anger, please put your pride down and hear this: though I think less of you daily, my daughters love you. We all know you aren't their real dad, but that doesn't matter to them. Because they love you, when you act that way, and when you say those things, it hurts them... badly. And it sticks with them. It sticks with them so vividly that they bring it up to me in a shameful manner as if they somehow are bad girls, and deserve that treatment, and they bring it up at the most random and unrelated times. Like when we are taking a walk and discussing their day and what they want for dinner. Please understand the effect you have on them, please react to their misbehaving (or whatever prompted you to say those things) with love and patience, and not hurtful words and shaming actions.
Just so you are prepared to discuss it with them should it ever come up, here is what my reaction was: I told the girls that you love them very much. I told them that you didn't mean it, and that you are new to being a daddy and are trying your best and doing a very good job, but just like everyone else (including me) you make mistakes. I told Kira that it was a mistake that you told her she was a coward... but that's ok. I told Drea that she was not annoying, and that it was a mistake to use that word in reference to her. I also told them that we get to forgive whenever someone hurts us no matter what they've done.
They forgive you. Don't do that shit again.